Microsoft's new ad: Even Dell tablets are better than iPad

Continuing its fun squishing the iPad and using Siri to do it, Redmond takes aim at the iPad's zooming deficiencies, among others.

Microsoft is not going to stop until iPad sales go down to zero.

It's not going to stop until there are no iPads left in the world.

Because this is payback and war and so many other cliches of aggression that companies are fond of exhuming.

In its second assault on the iPad released Thursday, Microsoft tries to explain very quietly that even a Dell tablet is better than an iPad.

Just as in the first ad of this phase, Redmond is using Siri's measured tones to show how a Windows tablet measures up to an iPad. This time it's the Dell XPS 10.

You will be stunned into comparing your Prius with a Ferrari when I tell you that only the most advantageous comparisons to the Dell tablet are mentioned.

You must decide whether a simple insertion of an SD card is a vital ingredient in your life.

You must decide whether pinch-to-zoom on your home screen makes you shiver with uncontrolled tremors of joy.

Naturally, Microsoft would also like you to go to its comparison Web site in order to bathe in all the fine details.

The Dell is 0.04 pounds lighter than the iPad. Its display is 0.4 inches bigger.

Oh, if only a Dell machine could engender even 0.4 percent of the positive emotions that an iPad does.

The sell would then be so much easier.

I just asked Siri whether the Dell XPS 10 is a good tablet.

She replied: "There's the iPad, and then there's...well, nothing I guess."

Yes, she just does the Microsoft ads for the money.